Videos
Every fan of music knows there is no substitute for the live show. Even though I do prefer the album version of most songs (I believe perfection is achieved in the studio—if you have to change the song when it’s live, you’re doing something wrong), a good live performance can add exciting elements or give further insight into the song. That, and they can just be so damned entertaining. So what better way to kill a snow day than with a few minutes of live music entertainment? And who knows, you might even discover a new band. So here are a few of my favorite one-off live performances, in no particular order.
Nine Inch Nails – March of the Pigs
“But wait,” you say. “This is the official video. I thought you said ‘live?’” Funny story. This was the “performance” part—the lip-synching—of what was supposed to be a much more in-depth video for March of the Pigs. You can hear Trent at the beginning saying, “Roll sound. Sound?” When whatever intern doesn’t get to it, Chris Vrenna picks up the slack and starts playing the opening drum riff. I love the point when it switches from Trent Reznor looking bored to him nodding his head as if to say, “Okay, we’re going to do this.” What follows is a spur-of-the-moment, stripped down live performance.
Tomahawk – God Hates a Coward
Here is where those “exciting elements” I mentioned before come into play. It’s great to see the equipment Mike Patton uses to get three different sounding vocals, especially the gas mask! It helps that Mike Patton is a great singer and a fantastic frontman.
Jeff Buckley – Grace
I’m not sure where I first saw this, but it’s my favorite live performance from the late, great Jeff Buckley. It’s videos like this that make me regret not being born 10 years earlier so I could catch a few of his shows. A solid performance that also showcases his amazing vocal ability; the climax at the end always gives me goosebumps.
Yeah Yeah Yeahs – Maps
My favorite Yeah Yeah Yeahs song. There is nothing particularly exciting about this one until the end, but it’s a great way to finish the song.
Beck – Clap Hands
Beck has always been one of the more innovative performers around, and this video only reinforces that. While he plays what is probably one of the easiest guitar riffs of all time, his band steals the show with their awesomely percussive dinner.
David Ford – Go To Hell
Even though “State of the Union”—a video of similar concept and a song of higher caliber—is what really got me in to David Ford in the first place, this video is done much better. This doing everything himself and looping it to gradually build to a complete song has come to be a hallmark of many of his videos, as well as his live show. Which, by the way, is a must-see.
A Perfect Circle – Judith
I don’t know why I like this performance so much. Maybe because it was the first time I’d see APC, or even the first time I’d really seen Maynard (my biggest man-crush). Maybe it’s just Maynard’s super awesome suit (which I want a replica of for my wedding) or just the fact that I like to watch Maynard on stage. Either way, it’s a great performance and definitely one of my favorites to watch.
A Perfect Circle – Judith – Live on Conan
Uploaded by Consommateur_74537. – Watch more music videos, in HD!
Fleet Foxes – Mykonos
I had been aware of Fleet Foxes previous to seeing this—had even listened to their album a few times—but it wasn’t until this very performance that LeeAnne and myself became fans. It’s a great song and a great performance, which is only elevated by the ending. This is another band I would suggest seeing live, as their harmonizing is enchanting and their music is excellent.
The Mars Volta – Son et Lumiere/Inertiatic ESP
Of any band I’ve seen live, be it in person or on video, I don’t think any has as charismatic a frontman as The Mars Volta’s Cedric Bixler-Zavala and, to a lesser extent, guitarist Omar Rodriguez-Lopez. Both could command your attention with the pure energy that flows through them once the music starts. I never had the ability to see Freddie Mercury of Jim Morrison live, but one day I’ll be able to brag that I saw Cedric Bixler-Zavala.
If any of the links don’t work, please let me know. Otherwise, enjoy the videos and link me to some of your own.
Rob Zombie: Hellbilly Deluxe 2
Artist: Rob Zombie
Album: Hellbilly Deluxe 2
Release Date: 02.02.10
Label: Roadrunner
Producer: Rob Zombie
It was with a marked lack of excitement that I got Rob Zombie’s latest album; I hadn’t even heard about it until he’d said something via Twitter, and even then it took a while to convince myself to get it. I don’t know what made me take the time on the album; maybe a sense of nostalgia for college or some misguided sense of dedication to Rob, who’s brought me a lot of entertainment since the mid-90s. And I don’t know why this one, either, as I’d completely skipped over Educated Horses (which, from what I read, was not a big mistake). The best reason I can come up with is the album’s name. Hellbilly Deluxe was a solid CD, so maybe this one would be as well.
While I am still in the process of re-experiencing Zombie’s solo catalogue, I may have to go out on a limb right away and say this could be his best solo work. The songs are tight, many of them coming in under three minutes, and none seem to drag. “Less is more” is a great business model for Rob, as songs about horror movies and horror movie monsters can become tedious when you have album after album full of them. The great thing is, though, we haven’t come to expect anything more from him. No one picks up a Rob Zombie album looking for blistering social commentary or astounding wordplay; they expect to hear about werewolves and things that lurk in the night, which is exactly what we get. But they key is that we never get too much at once. Even the final song on the album, “The Man Who Laughs,” which comes in at almost nine minutes, doesn’t seem long as it’s divided by an excellent drum solo.
And though Rob delivers only what we’ve come to expect of him over the last 20-odd years, the real backbone of the album is the guitar work of John Lowry. John worked on Educated Horses, but it definitely sounds like he’s been given much more free range to do his own thing this time around, which vastly improves the musical landscape of the album. From the backing riffs to the solos, Lowry shines throughout the entire CD, at points resurrecting classic Southern rock sounds and even Led Zeppelin (the guitar riff on “Werewolf, Baby” sounds a lot like “Custard Pie”). He then mixes these classic sounds with what could almost be described as circus music, creating what you might hear if Molly Hatchet toured with Barnum and Bailey.
My only real complaint on the album—aside from the lackluster lyrics—is the horror movie samples, once again at the beginning of almost every single song. And while I am praising him for finding his niche and sticking to it, a line or two from a different 1950s horror film at the beginning of every song is starting to get redundant. It’s even more annoying when it comes in the middle of a song. The culmination of this is when he plays a sample from Werewolf Women of the SS—a trailer he wrote for the Grindhouse movies. So here we have a song about the Werewolf Women, who he wrote a movie trailer for, sampling lines from the movie trailer he wrote. It would be utterly self-indulgent if the song wasn’t so damned whimsical.
In the end, though, it is what it is. Zombie isn’t blazing any new ground here, though Lowry is trying his damnedest to do so himself. The horror movie lyrics do hold the album back, but the short songs and excellent guitar work help to keep anything from feeling too tedious. I doubt this album will come anywhere near my overall top 10 for the year, but taken for what it is—pure entertainment—I will give it eight out of 10 resurrected corpses.
High Street Grill: Winterfest 2
On Saturday, LeeAnne and I met up with our friends Mel and Ray of Bathtub Brewery to check out High Street Grill’s second annual Winterfest in Mt. Holly, NJ—a beer festival made up of two 1:45 sessions, held in a tent in the parking lot and boasting 40 beers from 20 breweries across the states. The caliber and distance of some of the breweries surprised me; I expected to see the locals and the smaller breweries (Troegs, Yards, Victory, Boaks), but I was caught a bit off guard by the likes of Stone, Magic Hat, Flying Dog and Left Hand. One of my favorites, Unibroue, even had Canada represented.
Unfortunately, this being my first beer festival, I made the rookie mistake of forgetting my trusty Moleskine and pen. Luckily, they had a paper handout to keep notes on, but I found that I had enough trouble wrestling with the paper just to check off the beers I was trying. Plus, I’m still a relative beginner when it comes to beer, so my concentration was less on noting what I tasted and more on trying to taste the things Mel and Ray were noting.
All the shortcomings at the festival were not my own, however. The most first problem I noticed was the size of the tent: either it was too small or there were too many tickets sold. Once we started to really experience the clientele at the festival, I started to think it was the latter. This is what I imagine the New Year’s Eve open bar deals to be like; more drunken frat boys than a rape suspect line-up trying to get as drunk as they can to make the best of their ticket price. How naïve of me to think it would be a laid back group, a larger version of the four of us, just trying to try some new beers and hang out. The length of the sessions also left something to be desired—about 20 beers. With the crowd and the limited time, the session flew by and we were only able to get to about half of the breweries.
Overall, though, it was a great time. I was able to drink exactly 20 beers, all of them new to me, which really isn’t bad for a little less than two hours and $30. There are a few more I would have liked to have tried, but it was nothing to complain about. The festival was also bordered by a great time with LeeAnne, Mel and Ray; lunch at the High Street Grill, walking through the Mt. Holly Fire and Ice festival, and having coffee and desert at the Robin’s Nest. The pumpkin mousse pie might have been the best desert I’ve ever had.
At the end of the day, beer is a constant learning experience for me. Even though I recently hit my milestone of 200 different beers, I’ve only just begun to learn about it. I’ve learned what I like and what I don’t care for, but I’m still sussing out differences between styles and their many different characteristics. Going it on my own hasn’t helped much, but with the guidance of Mel and Ray I was able to pick up a little more knowledge. I can read about beer until my eyes fall out, but there’s no replacement for experience. And they were even kind enough to give me three bottles of their own home brews, which I cannot wait to dive into.
My current beer count stands at 239 with a few more to add in the next week. After that, though, I think I might take a little time off of beer for financial reasons. Also, I was thinking about having a beer yesterday around 10am. That kinda scared me.
SEPTAquette
A Comprehensive Guide to Not Being a Douchebag on Public Transit
No one likes taking public transit. It’s uncomfortable, it’s never on time, and it’s usually full of sketchballs you wouldn’t be caught dead within a 100-foot radius of in a normal situation. Things are made especially worse when the person next to you—or you yourself—are being a complete asshole. After observing people on SEPTA for the last two years, I’ve come up with a list of things everyone can do the next time you find yourself on the Loser Cruiser to make all of our trips much more tolerable. Some of them are obvious, some of them not so much. But as obvious as some may be, no one seems to be following them, so they must be said.
1. RESPECT PERSONAL SPACE.
1a. Don’t spread out. This is a bus, not a luxury spa. You’re not going to be comfortable. Don’t slouch or take up half a seat with your knees. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had to hang out in the aisle because the jerk next to me feels it’s okay to imagine he’s in a big comfy leather chair in his living room. Instead, imagine you’re a teenage Catholic girl and keep your goddamn legs together.
1b. Don’t lean on me. The gentle lull of the bus is enough to put anyone to sleep, especially after a long day at the office. I get that. But if you’re falling asleep, lean back. Lean on the window. Whatever you do, don’t fall asleep on me. Only my girlfriend is allowed to do that. And not only don’t lean on me, just don’t touch me in general. Try to pay particular attention to your extremities as you wave them around as if no one is beside you. I know the space is limited; please try to act like it.
1c. Get off your lazy ass. If I’m sitting on the seat closest to the window and I need to get up, you get up too. Don’t just sit there and move your knees to the side. If you do that, chances are you’re going to purposefully get a face full of my ass. Act like a normal polite person and stand up to let me out; getting on your feet for a few seconds will not hurt you. I guarantee it will only help.
1d. Put your bag on the floor when you’re standing. Scenario: The bus is packed. You’re one of the unfortunate souls who has to stand in the aisle. Take your bookbag off your back or your satchel off your shoulder and set it on the ground. I know it can be dirty, but it’s just a bag. When you leave it on, it turns with you. If you shift to the right, so does your bag, which means it’s probably hitting me as I sit in an aisle seat next to your inconsiderate ass. Also, please stand with any genitals facing the front or back of the bus, not facing towards my face.
2. DON’T BE A SEAT HOG.
2a. Don’t take up an entire seat with your shit. The bus is getting full and you’ve got a backpack. Guess what? It’s not a special backpack; it doesn’t need a seat of its own. You didn’t buy a token for this backpack to have a seat. It can go on the floor or on your lap, just like your grocery bag, your coat, your briefcase, your purse, or your three-month-old child. If the floor is wet, do what I do with my own backpack and hold it in your lap. If there’s something in there that makes your bag too heavy to hold on your lap for a half hour, you’re doing something wrong.
2b. Move in. Same scenario: the bus is filling up and you’re sitting in an aisle seat. People are walking by, looking for somewhere to sit, and you’re ignoring them. Just move to the window seat so someone can sit down without trying to maneuver around you or think you’re being an ass and blocking the seat so you can sit alone (which you probably are). So you’ll have to sit next to someone for the 20 minutes you’re on the bus. Big deal; like I said before, this isn’t super happy fun time. It’s public transit.
2c. Get up for old people/pregnant women/women with infants/the disabled. This would seem obvious, but no one does it. Whenever anyone notices someone in the aforementioned group, they are suddenly engrossed in their book, newspaper, iPod, fingernails—anything to distract them enough to justify in their minds not getting up for some lady who is eight months pregnant. Have some respect for other people and give up your seat; you can’t be so comfortable that you can’t help out someone else in need. I guarantee they’ll appreciate sitting down much more than you will. You can probably use the exercise anyway.
3. KEEP YOURSELF TO YOURSELF.
3a. Smell acceptable. For the love of god, take a shower. Put on deodorant. Brush your teeth. Don’t piss on yourself. And if you don’t shower, don’t put on deodorant or brush your teeth and don’t wait for a bathroom to pee, at the very least you should realize that dousing yourself in whiskey doesn’t do much to cover the smell. Dousing yourself with perfume or cologne doesn’t help, either. Any extreme scent is going to be noticed tenfold in a confined space packed with people. Have some courtesy and try not to smell like A. a perfume counter or B. a pile of drunken vomit.
PS – This goes for your food, as well. I understand some people like to eat smelly food, that’s no big deal. And some people have to use the bus to get takeout. If that’s the case, make sure the food is wrapped well so minimal foul smells escape. And don’t eat on the bus. Not only does your food smell bad, most likely you’re a disgusting eater as well. If you absolutely must use public transit to transport your food, please make sure it’s not a public display of stuffing your face.
3b. Keep the noise down. Thank god for iPods, because without mine I probably would’ve ended up strangling someone by now after listening to countless people scream into their cell phone about the worthless minutiae of their lives. It’s never anything interesting; your friend is an idiot and no one wants to hear what you’re saying to them. So please, speak with your inside voice and everyone around you will be much happier. This doesn’t only go for your phone, either. When you’re talking to your friend next to you, or even in the seat across the aisle, you don’t need to scream. And for the love of god, if there are children around, you should at least try to keep your foul language to a minimum. I’m no saint by any means, but I still try to keep my public conversations socially acceptable. One more thing: make sure your headphones aren’t leaking your shitty music to the rest of the bus. Seriously, how loud does it need to be? Even to drown out everyone else on the bus, my iPod only needs to be up half way. Not to sound like some cantankerous grandfather, but do you really need your music loud enough that I can clearly hear it three seats away? Answer: No.
PS – If you’re old enough to ride the bus alone, you’re old enough to act like you’ve been somewhere before. Pretend, for a moment, that you’re a responsible adult. I’m looking at you, high school kids. Stop yelling at your friends, stop using foul language because you think it’s cool to swear around kids, and stop throwing things. In general, stop being a douchebag: it’s a very important lesson to learn for the rest of your life.
PPS – Also, if you’ve got small children or babies, act like a parent and shut them the hell up when they start screaming and crying. Your terrible parenting may have allowed you to drown them out and ignore them at this point, but we can’t copy the vacant stare in your eyes or the ability to ignore your hellspawn. There is no television on the bus to placate them and do your parenting for you. Teach your kid a lesson about what is socially acceptable. Again, this will only benefit them later in life.
4. KEEP THE BUS CLEAN
4a. Don’t litter. We’re all using the bus, we all have to wade through the same shit. If we’re going to be putting our bags on the floor so you can have a seat, we don’t want to be putting them in the wrapper from your McDonalds double cheeseburger. Your were able to carry your trash onto the bus just fine, I’m pretty sure you can carry it off to the nearest trash receptacle. Chances are, if it’s an empty bottle or food container, it’s lighter now than when you originally had it, so it will be even easier to carry with you. Also, your nonchalant dropping of the wrapper is noticed—you’re not that smooth. Don’t pretend to accidentally drop something. When there’s an item in your hand and then it is no longer in your hand, you notice that it is gone. So do we.
PS – This is especially annoying when you have cylindrical garbage that is rolling all over the bus, especially when you leave some liquid in it and it trails all over the place. Don’t try to roll your bottle down to me to pick up for you; pick it up yourself.
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So there you have it. Though they are wordy, the rules are simple. Follow them (there are less than 15) and you and everyone around you will have a much easier time on your way to work. If I’ve left anything out, please let me know. Now we just need some etiquette lessons for the douchebag drivers.
The Zombie Project
I have always loved horror. From picking up my first Stephen King book in fifth grade (Cujo) to not being able to get through the entirety of the 1990 remake of Night of the Living Dead because I was scared out of my mind, there has always been something about scary books and movies that appealed to me. And ever since seeing that remake of Night of the Living Dead, there has always been something about the zombie film that appealed to me even more.
There is something about zombies that make them seem unstoppable. There are ways to get past werewolves, vampires, Frankenstein and any other mythical monster you can think of, but zombies cannot be stopped or contained. Maybe it’s the overwhelming hordes, the unrelenting single-minded pursuit of human flesh, or the extreme communicability of the zombie “disease.” Either way, they are terrifying.
I’m the kind of guy who has an escape route planned if I’ve spent over an hour in your house. I fall asleep at night thinking about different scenarios of a zombie apocalypse: what would happen, what I would do, how I would save my loved ones. I know how I would protect my apartment from a small outbreak and I know where we would go in case of a full-out end of days scenario.
Anyway, back to the movies. I love them, and I’ve loved them since before loving them was cool. Zombies have become a pop culture item now, with college campuses dominated by games of Humans vs. Zombies and zombie walks occurring around the country. One of the better parts of the widespread popularity of zombies is the now widespread availability of zombie books and movies. Max Brooks has emerged as a zombie guru with his two books; remakes and re-imaginings of the zombie genre are big in Hollywood. 28 Days Later revolutionized the zombie and the Dawn of the Dead remake was better than anyone had the right to expect. Night of the Living Dead is being remade and George Romero is still adding to his “…of the Dead” franchise. Things could not be better for a zombie fan.
Which brings me to my current predicament: I’ve seen plenty of movies. But I haven’t seen all of them. Not all of the good ones, at least. Nor have I seen a lot of the more popular ones, or I haven’t seen them since college, when I was half paying attention and half enamored with my newfound broadband internet access. Over the weekend, I decided I needed to really dive into the genre. I’m currently reading World War Z and plotting a zombie-based TV show I’d like to write (a niche that is sorely in need of filling), so what better time to really get into the movies?
But which ones? Which are the best? I decided to scour the internet to get peoples’ opinions on which zombie movies are the best. I found 16 top zombie films lists, most of them being top 10s, but some ranging to Top 30. They come from reputable sources (boston.com, Entertainment Weekly), not so reputable sources (washcycle.com, a bicycling website) and some from zombie websites (ZombiePhiles, Zombierama), so you know they’re good.
After compiling all the lists and plotting each movie’s position on each list, I assigned a points system to rank the movies. Since the biggest list had 30 entrants, I reversed the points and applied them for each list (ie, a film ranked #1 would get 30 points, #2 would get 29 points, etc.) After adding those points, a movie got a 10-point bonus each time it was voted #1 and a three-point bonus each time it made a top five. In the 16 lists, 59 movies were named (of which I will weed out some as not being true zombie movies). All of the top five were mentioned on 15 of the 16 lists, and the top two were in the top five of 80% of the lists they were on. Four George Romero films made the top 20; five if you count the Dawn of the Dead remake. The following list is all of the movies that were ranked, which will become all of the movies I will watch in the general future. I’ll keep notes and write my thoughts on each one and make a list of my own. I’ll also include some other zombie movies, and any other suggested to me as must-see. Until then, though, the list.
List format:
MOVIE TITLE [Year]: Points (#1 Votes)
Ie, if I had ZOMBEACH [2009]: 500 (8), it would mean my film “Zombeach,” which was released in 2009, totaled 500 points and had eight #1 votes. Simple, right?
01. NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD [1968]: 490 (4)
02. DAWN OF THE DEAD [1978]: 460 (5)
03. SHAUN OF THE DEAD [2004]: 440 (1)
04. 28 DAYS LATER [2002]: 405 (1)
05. DEAD ALIVE aka BRAINDEAD [1992]: 391 (1)
06. DAWN OF THE DEAD [2004]: 271 (2)
07. RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD [1985]: 252
08. ZOMBIE aka ZOMBI 2 [1979]: 218 (1)
09. CEMETERY MAN aka DELLAMORTE DELLAMORE [1994]: 191
10. DAY OF THE DEAD [1985]: 183
11. RE-ANIMATOR [1985]: 146
12. THE SERPENT AND THE RAINBOW [1988]: 108*
13. ZOMBIELAND [2009]: 108*
14. WHITE ZOMBIE [1932]: 99*
15. FIDO [2006]: 99*
16. ARMY OF DARKNESS [1993]: 84
17. I WALKED WITH A ZOMBIE [1943]: 77
18. LAND OF THE DEAD [2005]: 75
19. 28 WEEKS LATER [2007]: 66
20. PLANET TERROR [2007]: 62*
21. EVIL DEAD 2 [1987]: 62*
22. RESIDENT EVIL [2002]: 57
23. DEAD SNOW [2009]: 52
24. BIO ZOMBIE [1998]: 45
25. I AM LEGEND [2007]: 43 (1)
26. NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD [1990]: 41
27. PLAN 9 FROM OUTER SPACE [1959]: 40
27. PET SEMATARY [1989]: 40
27. TOMBS OF THE BLIND DEAD [1971]: 40
30. DEADGIRL [2008]: 39
The rest of the movies were: 31. Versus, 32. Let Sleeping Corpses Lie, 33. [REC], 34. Pontypool, 35. The Dead Next Door, 36. Dance of the Dead, 37. Children Shouldn’t Play with Dead Things, 38. The Evil Dead, 38. Junk, 40. Night of the Creeps, 40. Wild Zero, 40. Deathdream, 43. The Omega Man, 44. Dead Set, 45. Night of the Comet, 46. Zeder aka Return from the Dead, 46. Dead and Buried, 46. Undead, 49. Homecoming, 50. Shockwave, 50. Flight of the Living Dead, 52. Resident Evil: Extinction, 52. Quarantine, 54. Dead Meat, 55. Diary of the Dead, 56. Zombie Strippers, 57. Evil, 58. Plaga Zombie: Mutant Zone, 59. Invisible Invaders.
*Ties were first broken by the number of lists a movie appeared on, followed by top-five lists.
As you can see, I’ve got a lot of work to do, however a labor of love it will be. Many of these I cannot wait to revisit, and there are many I’ve never seen that I can’t wait to dive in to. I’m also certain many will come off the list, because while a few do contain zombie elements, I wouldn’t describe them as “zombie movies.” Evil Dead 2, for sure. And while I’ve only seen bits and pieces of The Omega Man, I’m almost certain it lacked any kind of real zombie element.
As soon as I come up with my grading system and the criteria I will be looking at, I’ll let you know. After I come up with all that, it will be time to get zombiefied. I hope you all will watch along, or at least contribute some comments to the proceedings. I will post links to each list I found later for any interested parties.
On A Quest
I’ve always had my big “quests” in life, whether it be the quest to graduate college, get out of West Virginia, or just try a certain food. In the past few years, I’ve accomplished a lot, but there still remains a large handful of things I would like to do, taste or try before I die. Here is my list as it stands, with the things marked off that I’ve completed. Think of this as my version of my girlfriend’s “Things to do Before 40” list.
FOOD TO TRY
__Wagyu Beef
__Sea Urchin
__Oysters
XX Foie Gras
XX Sweetbreads
XX Bone Marrow
XX Escargot
__Polish Boy (in Cleveland)
__Whiskey King Burger (Village Whiskey)
BEER TO DRINK
XX Estrella Damm Inedit
XX Morimoto Black Soba Obi
__Morimoto Imperial Pilsner
__Westvleteren 12
__Something I’ve brewed myself
RESTAURANTS TO EXPERIENCE
XX Morimoto Restaurant
__Gordon Ramsay Restaurant
__Rick Bayless Restaurant
XX Bobby Flay Restaurant
__Michael Symon Restaurant
XX Talula’s Table
XX Katz’s Deli
__Le Bernardin
__Thomas Keller Restaurant
__elBulli
PLACES TO GO
__Mt. Everest
XX Rome
XX Paris
__Japan
__Amsterdam
XX Ireland
XX London
__Germany
XX Area 51
__Antarctica
__Iceland
I’m sure there are plenty of others I can’t think of at the moment, but I’ll be sure to add them if they come to mind. The list is a work in progress, always, so it should be changing quite often.
Avatar
I know I’m a little late to the party, but last night the girlfriend and I went out to see James Cameron’s Avatar. With all we had heard about the movie, it was nearly impossible to resist seeing, even though the girlfriend has trouble seeing 3-D, it’s a sci-fi movie and almost three hours long: all great deterrents to her. But, she knows I love movies and that I wouldn’t want to miss this, so she took a bullet for me.
When it comes to the actual movie, I suppose I should start with the special effects, as they were the real driving force and source of hype. On my old movie review website, we would rate the different aspects of films on an A-F scale; for this one, however, we’d need to come up with something better than A+ to describe the effects. These are the kinds of effects that make George Lucas think, “I wish I could do that.” [Side note--the dialogue, while not the greatest, is also something that would make Lucas think, "I wish I could do that." But so would the dialogue of two monkeys chattering at each other. I digress.] Everything about this movie was visually stunning, especially with the addition of “Real-D.” The imaginations that had to come up with all the different elements of the film have got to be some of the best. This is an entire world created from imagination and animated in the most realistic of ways. And most importantly, the Na’vi were realistic enough that it wasn’t cartoony, as many other CGI aliens have been. You are able to put aside your disbelief and knowledge that they are computer-generated, which makes the movie more believable and more enjoyable. [And I don't think Sigourney Weaver has ever looked better than she did as her avatar.] I had trouble finding any flaws with that aspect of the movie.
And as for the 3-D, it was pulled off excellently. There were never too many in-your-face 3-D effects; it was used more to give this world more depth rather than to make people jump when a finger was pointed in their face. And the things that did pop out were more background elements than, say, people pointing guns directly in your face. It was more on the peripheral or as an afterthought, which greatly added to the movie experience as a whole. The only downfall was that it did seem to make some of the action scenes a little blurry, but that could have just been my eyes adjusting to the 3-D near the beginning of the film. I don’t remember having a problem at the end.
The storyline, however, is where the movie stumbles. It seems almost every part is some kind of recycled or cliched element, though the fact that it takes place on a different planet in the future makes this easy to forgive; the effects and the ideas are the real driving force here. But really, the spy falling for the other team and helping them battle his team who he sees is in the wrong has happened 100 times before. Throw in the stereotypical evil, greedy corporate CEO and the death-is-the-only-way over-the-top Army guy and you’re getting dangerously close to triteness. And while I do love Giovanni Ribisi in any role (and he did do very well), Stephen Lang was way over-the-top. As outrageous as Robert Duvall was supposed to be in Apocalypse Now, Lang goes beyond that tenfold; and while the Na’vi are believable and realistic, Col. Quarich comes off as unbelievable and cartoony.
Everything else about the movie was solid. And I know it may sound like a minor element, but I like that the characters swore a few times. All too often, you find movies trying to be overly PG-13, but this one is PG-13 without being condescending; I hate it when in a heated moment someone says, “We’re in deep soup now!” For me, that is what makes something unrealistic.
Overall, the movie is worth seeing as soon as you can see it. While the story is less than stellar, the animation and effects are well worth the price of admission and probably more. I would also hang on to your 3-D glasses, as you’ll probably be going back for another showing. My final grade would be an A-, due to the special effects being heavily weighted since they are obviously 90% of the movie.
Resolutions: 2010
This year, I actually decided to hop on the bandwagon and make myself some resolutions. In years past, I’ve avoided making them, knowing that I would last until about the end of January (like 90% of all other resolutionists). I thought, why bother? Why kid myself? But, this year will be different–I’m actually making resolutions geared at things I really want to do. Before, if I’d said I would quit smoking, I wasn’t ready to quit smoking. Forcing something you’re not ready for will only hinder your chances at achieving your goal. So, this year, I’ve thought things through and come up with a list of a few resolutions I’m actually ready to make.
- Learn more about beer. I’d like to be able to write my thoughts on different beers a little more coherently and concisely. I’d also like to know what reviewers mean when they say things like “tastes of leather.” Does a beer really taste of leather? I’ve got a few new books about beer, so that should help.
- Brew my own beer. I’ve been interested in beer long enough that it’s high time I threw my hat into the home brewing circle. I would love to be able to open a bottle knowing that my own hard work and know-how has paid off and I am reaping the rewards of these things. And then I want to be able to say that it tastes of leather.
- Get my finances under control once and for all. I’ve been back and forth with the financial situation; it seems it’s a monthly thing: some months I’m doing great, some months I’m just scrounging by. I want to be doing well at all times. I want to be able to pay my bills, put money in savings and have spending money all at the same time.
- Improve my health and keep it that way. There is no doubt that, since moving in with my girlfriend, I’ve become infinitely healthier, but I’ve also put on at least ten pounds in the recent past and become pretty inanimate when I’m at home. The dog has helped, but we’ve got a new elliptical and we’re both getting into a personal Biggest Loser challenge (starting tomorrow). I’d like to lose the ten pounds and maybe ten more throughout the year and try to maintain that weight, as well as a more active lifestyle. I quit smoking and I stopped drowning everything in Ranch dressing, so this is the obvious next step.
- Write 101 blog entries. I always want to write in my blog and keep it up to date, but I never seem to be able to convince myself to do so. Hopefully, as with my beer challenge, I can convince myself with this little resolution to keep things going. 101 posts in a year is equivalent to about two per week, which should give me plenty of time to think up topics to write about and do some research into what needs to be researched. Some weeks, of course, will have more than two entries and some will have less.
Those are the main ones. There are, of course, a few others like be a better boyfriend or try to write more in general. Hopefully I can stick to all of them and see them all to fruition. Or at least see them past the end of January.
